Used my phone not even 10 minutes ago and I can’t find it.
This isn’t cute. This isn’t fun. This makes me feel fucking worthless when this happens. And it happens very frequently. I can’t keep track of anything. I can’t keep my thoughts straight. This is my life, and its fucking exhausting.
I hate when there’s some gross body thing and people are like “Its perfectly normal!” Yes. Yes it is normal. You are absolutely correct. But so is shitting, puking, masturbating, pissing, and having snot come out of your nose. But that doesn’t mean I want to sit next to people doing those things on the bus. Or see pictures of it. Except masturbating.
Happy Mother’s Day to the lady who once laughed so hard at my dad falling down the steps that she peed her pants.
Getting real tired of people on XBox Live telling my girlfriend to get back in the kitchen.
Idiots, our XBox is IN THE KITCHEN! How the else would she be able to play?
That’s the most unoriginal, unfunny joke I’ve ever heard.
This is among the reasons why I hate offensive humor. No one even tries to be funny. They just expect to say something offensive and get a laugh.
Please enjoy this picture of my balls as a response.
We all know that “all artists steal.” However, did you know that reciting this to a Target employee or police officer will NOT get you out of a shoplifting charge?